1-800-SUICIDE

Yeah, that really is a phone number.

Anyhow, I was sitting around bored on the internet when Clush linked me to a list of depressing MSN names. These were pretty amusing, and I longed to put one as my MSN subline, but my contact list contains retards who'd take it seriously.

As such, I decided to share some of them with other people. So, I googled 'teen forums' and signed up to the first two I found. I'd intended my username to be LonelyBoy17 on both, but a typo on the first, and the shocking fact that LonelyBoy17 was already taken on the second meant that I'm LoneyBoy17 (adds to the realism doesn't it?) and LonelyBoy16.

Given that I was signing up to post depressing thoughts, I found the following bit of the sign up process pretty amusing:



I amalgamated a bunch of the depressing names into a stereotypical emo poetry format (and I swear, I've changed not one word from the originals, nor added or removed a thing) and posted them in two separate threads. I quite liked the intelligent advertising shown after one of my posts:



Anyhow, the replies are looking pretty hilarious, so you might want to check the threads for updates, they're to be found here and here.

Sure, I'm going to hell. But I'm going to get there in style:

I walk through fire, I walk through waves,
Darkness is overwhelming with hate and pain.
I live a life of misery and hate,
I dream of being loved and safe.

Living is a nightmare, but suicide's reality,
Tears, scars and death... thats all life is to me.
Kill me now, you know you want to,
It's not like I want to live anyway.

Thorns of time against the rose of the world, killing us slowly as my petals fall.

There are no tears, No feeling of guilt,
Nowhere to channel the anger, Nowhere to leave the pain.
Early morning moments, A glimpse of joy,
But it's soon over and I return to dust.

You can't kill me.. I'm already dead,

The closer we are to the soul, the further we are from perfection.
Why settle for honesty when you can breathe a perfect lie?
This is real, I'm afraid;
This time there is no hiding.

Lost until the eternal sleep comes.