Alcohole

As I believe I mentioned before, prospective employers have in the past been known to read up on this blog. I'm also aware that my mother visits too. If you fall into either of those two categories, now would be a great time to stop reading.

Yesterday was the end of the exam period for those studying Optometry, and for those studying Pharmacy. Given that I don't study Optometry or Pharmacy, this was clearly a time to celebrate for me - as I was surely free from all exams in both subjects for.

Things started off well, we went to Gosta Green and sat in their beer garden drinking, whilst people nearby talked about telescopes and other optical machinery. Most of this talk didn't actually make sense, so we (the non-optometrists) decided to drink some more, in the hopes that it would become clearer.

Things started to get a bit cold as the evening wore on, and my clothes wore off (assisted by various girls), so we moved inside after awhile, when someone, possibly Claire, came up with the fabulous idea of everyone going back to Jason's flat in Lakeside, and drinking there.

Admittedly only say, half, of us had actually met Jason more than once (and Julie kept insisting his name was Ivan), but this seemed a great idea, so back we went. Tim's practical joke of pressing all the buttons in the lift backfired when he realised that there was no-one else in the lift, and that we were going to the fifth floor, but we all made the best of our special time together in the lift.

It was when we got into Jason's kitchen that things started to go a little bit wrong though. American television had unfortunately influenced me (and will therefore be sued forthwith) into thinking that taking alcohol through the eyeball would be a great idea, and as 3 out of 4 optometrists in the kitchen also thought it was a good idea (possibly influenced by alcohol themselves), I tried it out.

Now, the thing they never show you in those films, where the cool guy takes shots of vodka to the eye, is the bit directly afterwards where he falls on the floor in pain. I can however vouch for the fact that it does get you very drunk very quickly, with rather a large headrush. Jason kindly informed me (afterwards) that this was due to...mucus membrane absorption? I'll admit I'm a bit hazy on the science by now.

I'm not entirely sure how things proceeded after this, so feel free to correct me if you were there, but I believe the next great idea came after my lack of motor skills led me to spill some archers on the table. This combined with Jason's wonderful advice resulted in me trying to snort the archers - both with a straw and without. Aside from slight pain, I don't believe this worked very well, but I did manage to get it to come *out* of my eye, which was fun.

In fairness, it could have worked well, and I was just already so drunk I didn't notice the increase in blood alcohol by now. Naturally, the quarter bottle of Archers that was left needed to be finished, and just drinking it would be rather an anti-climax by now, and so I (and yes, I am completely making this up as I have little recollection) thought "Archers is a girls drink...what do you do with girls? Hey, I know..."



I woke up in my own bed, mostly clothed, so I presume the rest of the night wasn't so fun. No idea though, none at all.